When is it Love

K (my guy) is leaving for three months. I was upset because he wanted to go to dinner with friends and not just me. Dinner Monday night went really well, F and her husband are always fun to be around and my spirts were high because we, the men that I work with and me actually acomplished something in the staff meeting we had, my department is only about 12 officers because it is federal. Back to dinner, we went for Chinese which is always one of my favorites. F and her husband have two kids the boy is six months younger than my daughter, who did not go because of pervious plans, and the girl who is almost a year. The boy always, as most four year olds do, provided the entertainment. All went well expect in I was think the whole time when do I get alone time with you and nervous about bring it up, I didn't want to say goodbye in the car when he dropped me off after dinner. On the hour drive home we were talking about his up coming trip and what he expected from it. Finally as he was getting close to my house I got the never up to ask if I could stop by after he came home from dinner with his family. His reply is as long as you don't mind me running around, because I still have alot do to before I leave. Fast forward about three hours and here I am standing in his house that is just pure catatrofy because he is leaving and he is also a single man. Not saying that all men are messy, but mine however is. I'm just looking are what still has to be done laundry still to wash and fold, vaccuming, the kitchen. I ask is there anything I can help with? He says if you want to. Well my weakness is a messy kitchen, if there is one I will find it and make it like new again. So where did I head, strait for the kitchen of course, with dishes piled up for I don't want to think how long, probably a little over a week, but still one guy can make alot of dirty dishes. As I started to clear way the mess and make the kitchen whole again, it hit me. Oh my goddess, I'm in love with him. What in the hell am I supposed to do about that. As I slowly inhale trying to clam myself. He asked me what was wrong, I coffessed my love and rushed into his arms. And maybe if I lived in a romance novel that might happen, but no. Then I thought on it a mintue, no it was not love but I do care for him, and for now that is enoughHe was in the laundry room at the time starting the washer again. I figure when the time is right I will tell him, but now he has enough to worry about. So when we said our goodbye we held each other a little longer than usual, I told him I would miss him, then walked home.