Sunday, March 25, 2007

Rejection

I was always told that rejection may sting but regret hurts.
It was Aug '04 I was up for reenlistment in the Air Force, but that Jan they had put out new Fitness standards, and if you did not pass you could not reenlist. In Aug I went to to my Fitness test and failed because of the run (I very much dislike to run and I was having back problems at the time). Well I was denied my reenlist because I did not pass. So I am thinking oaky this really sucks, here I am almost 9 yrs in, I'm going all the way to 20 if not more, then because of a stupid run I can not continue my career.
Three months rolls by still having dull back aches so I go to the ER one evening after work when I can not tolorate the pain any more. The doctors check me out, this has happened to me before, sharp stabbing pains in my lower back. When I was pregnant with my daughter I had the same thing for the first couple of months, but as I was on birth control, so I did not think I could be pregnant again. I was on depo and it makes your body 'act' pregnant with hormones, so I figure it was something having to do with that. Boy was I wrong, (side note: depo is not 100%) I was 16 weeks pregnant. Yikes!!!! Thats why I was having the back aches. So I thought I had a loop hole and could continue on with the rest of my career not problems. Which is correct, if you are pregnant during the time of your fitness test it does not count.
I went to talk to personnel about it, well the only one in the office did not know is job or want to do the research to find out. I told him that I was pregnant during my fitness test so it does not count and I could still reenlist (I already did my homework). He told me it did not matter if I was pregnant at the time I still could not reenlist, I needed to start preparing myself for separation. Here I was a sargeant with almost 9 yrs in being told by an airman with not even half that time in that I could not reenlist, because he did not want to look up a regulation, because of course he KNEW everything. I stoo up, looked at him and told him, "Fine it looks like I'm fucking getting out then doesn't it." Then walked out of his office.
I was so pissed and crushed, I loved my job and the Air Force, I didn't know what to do with myself. I could fight it, I could have gone to his supervisor, but I did not. Now almost three years later, I realize that the Air Force rejecting my reenlistment because of a stupid run, and the little airman who did not want to work were basically telling me that it was time for change. And change I did. Without that I would not have the job, and the people I work with who are wonderful. I am closer to my family as is my daughter. I am happier, more confident, everything about me is better. I would have not met the guy I'm dating now, and I probably would have never found this blog and everyone here.
So I believe rejection stings, but there is always something positive to be gained.

No comments: